Saturday, 22 May 2010

Sex, ties and...spectacles

I am devastated at the moment. Not because a family member has perished or because Charlton failed to advance through the League One play-offs (although I must admit that does still irk me). No, I am upset because Karl Kennedy's distinctive reading glasses are gone. Blown to smithereens in a blender, those red monstrosities are no more.

Dr K's shocking garb is now restricted to his patterned golfing jumpers. He donned an atrocious baby blue one this week on his 18-hole round with Susan at Erinsborough's local golf club.

At one point, Karl's wife even compared him to Tiger Woods. I've always thought there were similarities between the skin-flint Kennedy patriarch and the world's premier golfer - more to do with their womanising natures than their abilities with a 9 iron, however.

Elsewhere, I was shocked - and a little disturbed - to see that Toadie's impressive tie rack hangs above his bed. What sort of ornament is that? Couldn't he find a pretty picture of waves rippling against a bay? Oh yeah, Dee died in that environment. Sorry mate, my apologies.

Another of the big stories - yes, I'm counting the the tie-rack saga as a big story - was the continued strife in Kate and Declan's relationship. The dancing Ramsay got all flustered when Napier tried to deliver her his pork sword and as a result, the pair spent much of the week trying to figure out what the other wanted from their union.

It comes as no surprise to me that Dec and his fair maiden aren't getting down to some jiggy jiggy. Kate is very attractive but I just don't see her as a sexual being. She needs to learn how to be a slut - perhaps blue box-owning Susan could teach her.

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