Monday 16 August 2010

Is it the Italians?

Susan's stalking has got even more vigorous over the last few days. Mrs. Kennedy's hater is still sending her frightful text messages and e-mails but he/she has now also resorted to following the former teacher home, resulting in Dr. Karl's wife undertaking an awkward, middle-aged woman jog to get back to her abode quicker in the hope of avoiding doom.

Who is behind this morally-reprehensible act of petrifying a feeble female? I think I know. Dark-coloured car, four doors, driver acting suspiciously. It's the Mafia, isn't it? I'm not quite sure what Susan has done to so severely irk the criminal underworld, but if she wakes up with a horse's head next to her on the pillow, my beliefs will have been proved correct.

Still, an equine skull would surely be an improvement on seeing Karl's visage every morning, he says, while a plethora of randy housewives across the land vehemently disagree.

Another member of the Kennedy household was in the action today, in the form of the vest-loving Ringo Brown. After much cajoling from his attractive girlriend Donna, local grease monkey Lucas, new Declan and a surprisingly charismatic skeleton, the Beatle-named builder decided to put down his pickaxe, shun his shovel and resubmit himself into paramedic school.

I suppose saving people's lives is more rewarding than digging a hole or tightening a nut (as you can see, I know very little about the world of construction), but I couldn't care less which career Frazer's little brother adopts - as long as it keeps him away from his guitar!

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